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Welcome to my Suju lifeee
Yuliant Joanne Ivan Ryo Tan Tingyuan!
Seventeen since 10th July 2010!
Singapore Polytechnic Mass Comm Year 1!
Ex-St Nickolodean!

Loves <3
Fernando Torres!
Justin Bieber!
Big Time Rush - Logan&Kendall&James!
The Wanted - Nathan&Siva&Jay!
Anthony Neely!
Jay Chou!
KPop!
Super Junior 15-strong!
Kibum!
Kyuhyun!
Hankyung!
Eunhyuk!
Eeteuk!
Henry!
Siwon!
Donghae!
Kangin!
SHINee - Minho&Taemin&Key!
SHINee Ring Ding Dong&Hello&Lucifer!
SNSD - Taeyeon&Hyoyeon&Seohyun&Tiffany&Yoona!
SNSD Run Devil Run&Oh&Gee&Genie&Hoot!
fx - Amber!
miss A - Fei&Suzy&Jia!
2PM - Nickhun&Junsu!

I wish I wish for all these,
Super Show 4!
A true prince who knows how to treat me right!
A bouquet of roses from you to me!
Pictures everywhere of you&me!
An awesome GPA grade (4.0 pls)!
To be on normal talking terms with Mum!

I'm just a click away, baby
When I'm bored, click here
Archives
Credits
How far apart both of us are after half a year,
It's the 22nd today.

And like the past 2 months, I've again wanted to tweet "IT'S 22ND TODAY!"
But then I stopped.
'Cos I know, it's supposed to stand for nothing at all.
And you'd not bother.
Or maybe you'd think in your mind why I would tweet that.
And you'd probably laugh and mock my foolishness for still being unable to let go when you have done so so easily.

But even after all this time, I just cannot forget.

It's officially half a year since I've known you.
And how ironic to see that damn arse calender in front of me with the 22nd box indicating '6th month', now slashed across by a marker,
'cos there is no longer a 6th month.
There is no longer someone there to tell me, "Hey, we've been together for 6 months. Happy 6th month!"

Now, I'm just recalling the only anniversary wish you ever wished me.
'Happy 3rd month! =D', you'd tweeted to me.

I don't know why I'm still thinking,
but probably little things trigger everything.

Because I'm a fool,
now the only thing I do is to look from afar.
And I know your heart is no longer with me,
and now we've probably become strangers.

I just can't believe it,
even up till now.

2 months and a week have passed,
and I'm still a fool waiting for a damn miracle to happen.
Just laugh at me.
Maybe I will wake up.

Friday, April 22, 2011 , 2:02 AM
That should, and still, be me.


That should be me, holding your hand.

That should be me, making you laugh.

That should be me, this is so sad.

That should be me, that should be me.




I actually wish it will still be me, after all this time.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011 , 12:55 AM
Looking forward, moving on.
6 hours more to school.

Mixed feelings all over again.
I don't know if I should be happy or sad.
No more late night outs, not much shopping, NO MORE REGULAR PONTIAN MEALS :((((

I think I should be happy and look forward to school though.

Probably a brand new start?

Monday, April 18, 2011 , 1:39 AM
I still care.
I still read your blog.
And I don't think you read my blog anymore since I'm out of your life, so I can happily blog and rant.
Now all I see on your blog is negative posts.
And they are no doubt, definitely never for me.

I don't know who they are for and I know I shouldn't be bothered by it.
It just....
breaks my heart seeing you with someone, even though I know perfectly that I have no rights.

I wonder why you've changed.
Or maybe you're just the same, only slowly becoming extreme.

Wherever did that ego piece of shit go to?
Why do you sound so not confident (?!) of yourself?
I mean, that guy I used to date was a lil' emo sometimes, but no way he'd become all 'attention-seeking' like now.
That guy I used to date know he's the best, the cutest, and no one could be better than him.

In short, he was still a somehow positive guy.
Now, he's just uh... breaking down?

I detest how you like to keep shit to yourself.
I detest how when I was with you, you refuse to open up to me.
How you should have just sit me down one day and just talk to me about what was bothering you.
You should know that I would listen, 'cos I bloody care.
I'd swear to God that I care so much about you, even more than the rest, that sometimes I'd feel guilty.
On normal days, I would think if there is any troubles behind that face or fake smile of yours.
But it'd be weird for me to approach you and ask randomly, "So, do you have any troubling stuff recently that you wanna talk to me about?"
Or maybe, I should really have done that.

You said I shut you out with my 'whatever'.
But when I said that, they weren't about any serious stuff.
So how was I supposed to know exactly what was troubling you.

I miss you.
I miss that you who is a Complain King and would just complain about every single shit.
You'd be an irritating piece of shit but at least I know what's wrong.

I hate people who keep mum.
Heart-to-heart-talks were created for a reason man.

And all I ever wished when I was with you, was to be able to carry any load with you.
Ironic much.


Kthxbai.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011 , 3:51 AM
How age don't match maturity,
Real men always have time for their woman, no matter what. Even if he's busy, he'll find a way to make time for her. ♥


That just mean,
you ain't a real man.

Think of the times I was alone when you should have been there by my side.
When I see happy couples out together hand in hand during weekends and festivals, I was roaming alone.
When I was alone even on Valentine's Day getting your gift, and to only break up with you a few hours later.
Thanks for making me feel alone when I actually had a boyfriend at that time.

Can you actually be in my shoes and know how I felt?
I bet you can't.

Kthxbye.

Monday, April 11, 2011 , 3:52 PM
Living this life alone,
I think I have been lying to myself way too much.

When I told myself it was all over, I realised it was not all gone.
When I told myself it doesn't hurt anymore, I still see myself crumble at little things.
When I told myself that it was time to keep away those memories, I refuse to replace even the slightest thing you gave me.

I'm living a bloody lie.
I can smile, I can laugh, I can cheer.
I can also cry and hurt myself and break into pieces.

Wasting my time away everyday,
thinking it will be easier to live like this.

No, it wasn't.
It was still the same.

But I believe in time.
Time will prove me wrong.
Time might fix my broken and shattered heart.
Time might help me heal.

But,
time will never bring you back to me anymore.

Tuesday, April 5, 2011 , 3:49 AM